Bad boy Santa

Hey you

Can you hear what I say

Santa's a pain in the ass

And he's flipping gay

I caught him the other night

With his trousers down

Giving some bloke a blow job

In some dirty fucking town

And Ruddolf he's a wanker

Didn't you fucking know

For using his red nose

To give Santa an awesome show

And all his little Elfs

Started singing christmas songs

As they skinned up joints

And passed the bong along

All getting high

While enjoying life too

Now this is the real Santa

And his bad boy crew

Who go out theifing

To get presents gallore

No much wonder the worlds suffering

And no one will open their door

That's why he's a fat bastard

Who ate all the pies

Because he's not stupid

He just fed us all lies

Giving us all hope

At this festive time of year

But he's really a bad boy criminal

Do you all hear

So don't listen to him

The pathetic fucking cunt

For he's nothing special

And that's putting it blunt

So if he comes to your door

With presents in his hand

You know their all ripped off

Do you fucking understand

And the police will come knocking

With a present of their own

And that's a night in the cells

So don't you fucking moan

Because you have been warned

All about this evil man

Who's a fucking well legend

With one awesome fucking plan