How could you cope

How could you cope

At a time when nothings cool

Going completely crazy

Like some kind of fool

Crying all the time

With very little sleep

As the flashbacks they take over

Turning you into a creep

Never want to see them

Which messes with your head

Oh dear no not again

Feeling like the living dead

Reliving that simple day

When bang goes a bomb

A what you gonna do

As everything goes wrong

As windows smash round you

As people scream in fear

As a mushroom fills the air

Which is so dammed near

Then a deadly silence

But what can you do

As people run in chaos

Along with your mates too

What are you doing

You don't really care

You got to save life's

If anyone's alive there

Digging in the aftermath

Not knowing what you'll find

As others shout around you

Clouding up your mind

Then someone shouts found one

Oh no it's one of our crew

As he went to get us lunch

With someone else too

Yet he wasn't breathing

He was dead at the scene

Now I'm reliving this nightmare

Which is no flipping dream

Then someone shouts found another

As I dig as fast as I can

Not another work man

Now that wasn't the plan

So I dig even deeper

Looking for someone to blame

Yet I'm completely shocked

For life is no game

Then I felt something wet

But couldn't see what it could be

So I dig even harder

Hoping to save someone you see

Then my eyes met something horrible

And I didn't know what to do

Except pull it from the rubble

Now my heads messed up too

With no arm or legs
And blood coming out its eyes
Oh what a nightmare
As I begin to cry

I'm holding a little toddler
Really close to my chest
I can't let it go
My head an absolute mess

Now who could do this
To someone so young
Which has messed up my life
Which is not fun

I can't even hold my own kids
Which is sad to say
But maybe I will get over this
And will hold them someday

So what would you do
In a way that's hard to bare
When your just a civilian
That simply does care

Would you turn to alcohol
And want to give up the fight
Well now it's my turn
To see the bright light

And try to use my art
And poetry I write
To show the world one thing
Good can come out of bad al-right.

For 17 years now I have been having nightmares about holding this child and never had no help to overcome my problems. The reality many people see things and react in many ways. Some by violence, some by drinking and some by taking drugs to block what happened. I was abused as a child but could never tell anyone and after this bomb went off my life changed. I took life into my own hands and punished those who hurt children. I ended up in prison over this but was released after 2 months after charges where dropped.  Many times I have been questioned by authorities for hurting paedophiles but they could never prove anything. I am very proud to be the man I am and believe more people should stand up for our younger generation.